Found these from some random message board, figured I’d go ahead and answer them here.

1) WHEN YOU WERE A KID, WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GREW UP?
I’m pretty sure I’ve answered this before, but I wanted to be a rapper.

2) WOULD YOU WANT TO LIVE IN SOME OTHER COUNTRY THAN THE ONE YOU LIVE IN NOW?

Nah, I’m pretty happy living in America. If I were forced to move out of the country, I guess I’d pick Canada, just because it’s close, so I could come back to visit rather easily, and at least I wouldn’t be required to learn another language, since they mostly speak English (although it would take some time getting used to that funny accent that they all have).

3) WHAT WOULD YOU THINK/HOW WOULD YOU REACT IF SOMEONE OF THE OPPOSITE GENDER TOLD YOU THAT THEY MASTURBATE TO YOU?

But, seriously, I guess it would depended on exactly who was telling me this, when and where they were telling me this and, mostly importantly, why they were telling me this.

4) WOULD YOU RATHER HAVE 15 MILLION DOLLARS AND NO FAMILY, OR $300,000 AND A FAMILY?

It depends on exactly what they mean by “family.” Do they mean, wife and kids? Because I’m never planning on having kids anyway, and while I’m open to marriage, if this choice is that I get the $15 million and that means I’ll never get married, well . . .

But if by “family,” they mean all relatives, as in I would not have any relatives at all, well then that’s different. There are plenty of relatives that I already have minimal contact with, so I could do without them, but others I would want to keep around. So I’d have to settle for the $300k (which would still drastically improve my life).

5) WHAT FEATURE OF YOURS ARE YOU MOST SELF-CONSCIOUS ABOUT?

My gap-teeth.

At least they’re not that bad.

6) WHO IS YOUR ROLE MODEL?

Who else?